A year ago, I quit my job… quit corporate business. I wrote a blog post about my mid life crisis (I quit corporate business) and moved on and never looked back. It was a long time coming. You can read about it here.
Quitting my job was the scariest thing I have ever done. Ever. Hands down. I am ridiculously responsible and it didn’t make any sense. But, I knew one thing and my husband definitely knew one thing and that was I. WAS. MISERABLE. In one of my reviews one year, I seriously told my bosses that I felt like a monkey could do my job. Maybe that was a little harsh but most days it felt meaningless. And monkeys are awesome so I am not sure why I used that analogy. I just wasn’t challenged at all. The days that were “challenging” were only because I was babysitting grown adults. Do you see my angst? I can’t even talk about it without seeming angry. I should have been so grateful to have a job. We had been through layoffs before. Maybe that is why it took me so long to quit.
So, I did quit. I went to another company for more money. Because, obviously, money would solve my angst. 6 months later I was officially self employed. (sarcasm)
I get email after email from you saying how brave I am and inspirational. It means the world to me but here is the thing….today, one year later, I can honestly tell you…I was crazy. I am crazy. I never felt brave, I felt scared to death. A lot of you have asked for advice so I am going to give it to you….but first, I want you to know….Every day, I question if I did the right thing. I walked away from a pension, health insurance and other benefits and salary to work 80 hours a week and to live, breath, sleep, eat, think about my business. You are not alone in these fears. This is crazy talk. For real. You can not do this without being crazy. And you have to do it scared. Our plan was to save up so we could afford me to quit….I don’t have kids but I assume that is like saving till you can afford to have a kid. It doesn’t happen. I have a lot of great ideas and I knew I could make the business work, but you can’t make it work, if you aren’t all in. You can’t. I had to do it afraid. but with a brave face. If you aren’t doing it afraid, you probably aren’t doing something right. If you aren’t afraid you probably aren’t seeing the risks. If you aren’t afraid, you don’t respect it. You have to know what you are up against.
I am still afraid. I still love what I do and I have not had a single day of regret. I think I am more afraid today than I was a year ago because I need to make sure I can continue growing our business into a “real” career so I can stop telling people I don’t have a “real” job. Won’t that be a revelation when I feel like I have a “real” job? lol.
Our business has changed more than I could ever imagine. We have three real employees (including me)….we thought hiring one would take years. Not only did it not take years, it was a necessity! We have a new business plan with a path for implementation. It totally makes me feel legit. We have a few big things planned before the end of the year and we are just so thrilled we were crazy enough to take this leap. Sometimes a brave face, a little bit of crazy, and a whole lot of fear can be a great combination.
The first step, was giving myself permission to quit corporate business. Brandt (my husband) was long on board. I was blocking myself from doing what I wanted to do, because I was SCARED. I decided, I didn’t want to regret not doing it. The fear of regretting it was worst than actually doing it. So, I gave myself permission to QUIT!
Isn’t that so interesting? We have built up expectations and stresses and ideas of what we have to do. WHY? I get it, I am still paying student loans….Loans that I don’t use or need anymore. I get having responsibilities but you can be happy. You don’t have to burden yourself to the point of being miserable. You can give yourself permission to not be miserable. Life is too short and too precious to come home grumpy every day. Having your own business is STRESSFUL, don’t get me wrong. It is HARD. But it is rewarding and challenging and all the things I was missing. I would have never had it, if I didn’t just let myself.
Don’t be your own blockade. I know a lot of you reading this want to do something other than what you are doing now. What is stopping YOU?
Tips to Quit Corporate Business
Come back tomorrow for my list of tips when leaving your “real job”!